A while back while watching the news I was horrified to hear the testimony of the three boys who were molested, raped and assaulted by a 17-year-old offender from the small community of Drumheller, Alberta. The same 17-year-old is now 18 and has been arrested for the kidnapping of a 6-year-old boy from the same area while out on ball for the first three offences. He was awaiting trial when he kidnapped the 6-year-old. An Amber Alert was sent out 3 hours after the kidnapping, and according to most homicide investigators, when a child is abducted, if they are not found within the first 3 hours they are either molested or murdered. This begs the question - why wait for 3 hours before issuing an Amber Alert?

   On the same news broadcast I listened to how the three young victims were being bullied in school and throughout the town - talk about adding injury to insult. These youngsters are victims not perpetrators. Where are the bullies getting their information from? And we are constantly being barraged in schools, in the news media, and other forms about bullying. It would appear the message is not getting through.

   The mothers of these young victims are fighting the fight of their lives. And guess what, in my humble opinion, if they never give up, they will win. They are up against odds so great just because they are unfortunate enough to make their homes in a close-knit community. Sometimes I think anonymity, which is ever present in a city, is much better than having to live in a community where everyone knows everyone's business.

   Most women will meekly keep their mouths shut rather than cause a ruckus and tell everyone how they feel. I admire these 3 mothers and wish there were more like them in the world. If some people wish to brand them as bit__ , I say they should be proud and hold their heads up high and keep up the fight.

   The fight that is right for their children, themselves, and the entire population of Canada. Don't depend on the Justice system, change the legislation. I am going to reprint an article that was once given to me by a friend, an article that I have published before, and think is worth publishing again. It certainly applies to these women and myself. I guess that's why I like it so much it speaks volumes in very few words.

BIT__DOM

When I stand up for myself and my beliefs, they call me a bit__

When I stand up for those I love, the call me a bit__

When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do things my own way, the call me a bit__

Being a bit__ means I won't compromise what's in my heart

It means I live my life MY way. It means I won't allow anyone to step on me.

When I refuse to tolerate injustice and speak against it, I am defined a bit__

The same thing happens when I take time for myself instead of being everyone’s maid, or when I act a little selfish

It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be who I truly am and won't become anyone else's idea of what they think I "should be"

I am outspoken, opinionated and determined. I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that.

So try to stomp on me, try to douse my inner flame, try to squash every ounce of beauty I hold with in me

You won't succeed. And if that makes me a bit_, so be it. I embrace the title and am proud to BEAR IT.

   If anyone thinks these mothers are bit__, well I am proud of them - they deserve the admiration of all human beings - they have proven beyond a doubt that they don't care how anyone feels about them. They have values and principals and are willing to do what they have to without feeling guilty or being cohorts of others. Keep up the good work, ladies.

   With all this said, I will tell you about me and being a bit__. For the past 5 or 6 years I changed drastically and tried to be what everyone thought I should be - a loving, forgiving mother, a friend who you thought you could walk all over, a sick person who depended on others, a businesswoman who let her business be run by others, and above and beyond everything else, be someone else everyone thought I should be. In the end it just doesn't work. All this has made me a stronger person, and made me realize I am who I am, what I am, and what I believe in - myself, Gail Sygutek. You will either hate me or love me - but you will definitely have an opinion about me. In the past I always marched to my own drumbeat and hardly ever followed the chain of command, unless I truly believed the commander was right. I have re-captured that again, and oh how much better I feel. I'm not perfect, I make lots of mistakes, but hopefully I learn from these mistakes - but like most humans I never do learn, but I constantly keep trying.

   I have quite a few acquaintances but very few friends (this I found out the hard way), I have also learnt a very hard lesson-you can't be everything to everyone, so you must be true to yourself, your values and your principles. Don't leave your well-being in anyone's hands but your own - take the reins of your life and never let go - not for anyone or anything. Don't be afraid to live - life is much too short, and when you are gone you are quickly forgotten - be you a queen or a peasant. You must be prepared to climb mountains if you have to, and walk paths when you can. Believe in yourself.

   Watch next week for "Looking Back" by John Kinnear, Pass Herald feature writer. You will also find my Christmas Town Talk in the Christmas Issue, to be distributed on Dec. 18th.

Watch next week for an article from John Kinnear - remember, I do one and John does one - which leaves both of us with only 2 articles per month.